As spiritual beings sometimes we may question whether it is even a good idea to be in a relationship at all. And it really is much easier to be single; that’s why monks are traditionally celibate. In my personal case I can say that being in a relationship takes a ton of energy that I could be directing to my work instead. However, I have chosen the Tantric path, this is very clear. And this path includes mastering being a human.
It’s very easy to be single and “enlightened”, because we check out into mystical worlds and in the most intelligent way avoid all the places that don’t feel comfortable: “why would I be in situations that just don’t feel good?”
When a relationship is there… and you cannot help but choose to grow through it… well, all the uncomfortable stuff is right in your face. And you cannot simply walk away, because there is another human to consider.
So if we choose to be a real human in this human world, I think a relationship is the best possible school for that.
And yes, it seems as if I’m much less productive (my workaholic self is agonizing), but actually, it’s not true. Because the more I grow as a human, the bigger spaces I can hold.
What I have realized is that my dharma is everything that happens to me.
Nothing can really be in the way, even if it seems challenging, it is only making me more aligned.
And this is priceless.