October 23, 2017

I know how common it is in couples: one partner gets very excited about something and wants to bring something fresh into the relationship, and the other partner is… well, resisting.

And if you have ever felt into Tantra, if you have become intrigued by it, if you have thought there might be something in it for you, something that could possibly create a lot of magic in your life…. If you have been following me for some time and been inspired by my content and you have the desire to try it out… I know that you definitely would like to invite your partner on this journey with you.

And one day you approach your partner and share about Tantra, but they express no interest in it whatsoever, or they even tell you that it’s a bunch of nonsense and you shouldn’t even try it by yourself.

You have no idea how common this situation is!

So what to do?

I feel that there is a yearning in the world for Tantra, this magnificent system of self-development which embraces all aspects of life: the light, the dark and everything in between. Tantra gives us specific techniques that turn our Love and Sex Life into a sacred journey of empowerment and transformation into the best possible version of ourselves.

In Tantra we dive into it all, we open ourselves to it all. And this is how we become deeply real, deeply truthful, deeply ourselves.

Here are 3 steps:

1. Get into Tantra by yourself.

Contrary to common belief you don’t actually need to have a partner to practice Tantra. Many of my students start when they are single. Or they come to courses without their partner and gain HUGE results in terms of uplifting their self love and self worth, body image, understanding their own sensuality, unlocking their own orgasmic potential… to name just a few things.

Once you have awakened yourself from inside, you start radiating this new uplifted state of being. And your partner is likely to get very curious: “what is it you are doing?”

Remember this: the less you try to prove – the better.

Be quiet and let your practice and your grace speak through you. No words will be needed. Your partner will start asking you questions, so you can wait patiently and know that it will happen!

2. Don’t overwhelm your partner with information.

Better offer a little bit, for example, you can reach out to them (when they are not busy doing something else! finding the right moment is gold!) and say: “Honey, I love you so much, and I think we have wonderful sex. I feel fulfilled with you on so many levels. {Very good idea to explain exactly the levels on which you feel fulfilled.} And I have tried/read about/attended something really special. I feel like it could help us to use what we already have together sexually, and add a new dimension to it. It could give us new ways to connect that we haven’t even though about, I feel it could help us make our beautiful sex life a true masterpiece. Does that sound exciting to you?”

After that, receive what they have to say. Really receive. Listen to the words that they use. Feel which part of what you were saying really touched your beloved. And then it’s your turn to speak to that. Don’t underestimate this! It is huge. Offer them exactly what they want, not what you think would be good for them!

3. Open up to the authority of a teacher to guide you both.

It’s very common that one of the partners plays the role of a teacher in certain parts of the relationship. Sometimes it is fine. Other times it may become really unhealthy. And let’s speak frankly, we all ultimately want to relax, drop into a beautiful space of merging and not have to guide anything.

This is actually a big win. If you love what I am saying and resonate with my presence, I might be that teacher.
I know in the core of my being that once we shift the way we see and have sex, empower and heal our sexuality, our entire life becomes extraordinary, and we finally start Truly Living.

Unlocking our sexual power is The Number One Key to expanding into this wild and beautiful existence.

Photo by @iamjodielouise

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