This is a post dedicated to the beautiful practice of female masturbation. No, it’s not only about jerking off. It’s about taking the time to explore ourselves, love ourselves, become one with ourselves and especially discover our magical spots.
When I talked to Sofia in one of our women’s groups in Thailand, we discussed the pros and cons of sex toys. As most of you probably know (from experience) vibrators are pretty strong and powerful when it comes to female masturbation, but at the same time they have a desensitizing effect in the long run . The buzz is more or less an unnatural mechanical sensation which no one, but your vibrator rabbit, is able to give you (not yourself and not your super lover either). Once we get used to this buzzing pleasure, sex or masturbation without a vibrator gradually starts to feel boring… maybe you know what I mean.
Anyway, today I want to show you a toy which is non-vibrating, non-toxic but powerful, elegant and very useful for exploring our bodies. This toy is, thanks to the universe, amazing for unleashing some deep pleasure in us. It’s designed to stimulate the G-spot in such an elegant way that the splashy water fun coming from the G-spot turns into a Goddess like experience. Ok, maybe I am exaggerating a bit, but it is true for me. My boyfriend gave it to me at Christmas a few years back. It came in this real classy black box with a white silk bag. My Lelo Ella comes in a sexy deep rose.
So I tried it out and at first felt a bit unsure what to do with it, as at this point I was still using vibrators. But the more I opened myself to the idea that I didn’t necessarily need a vibrator for my self-loving practice to feel pleasure, the more I opened to the Lelo too.
Healing Massage For All
I discovered that you can use the Lelo Ella for different purposes. The first is for a healing massage. It has a slight pointy side which is great for massaging the inside of your yoni (yoni is a Sanskrit word for vagina, literal translation “sacred temple” – S.S.).
As you might have heard, the yoni of a woman is a very sensitive organ, it stores a lot of emotions, traumas and past experiences. As with a stiff neck, if we don’t take care of it, the pain we experience might become even worse. So, we want to massage all the little knots or tensions out.
Of course you can use your fingers for it too. But you will see that you cannot reach very deep inside. So this is where the Lelo comes in. Use the pointy side, make little curves, or if you have discovered a little tension stay where you are and press a little deeper. Inhale and exhale… Use your breath to release. You can also use the the curvy side for massaging. Just see what feels best.
Discovering Your G-spot Pleasures
The other purpose is of course massaging your G-spot. Before you insert the Lelo, make sure you warm yourself up a little. Have a breast massage beforehand – that boosts your dopamine level and makes you want to dive deeper. Dance a little, move your hips, like a belly dancer. Anything that makes you relaxed and excited. Also massage your vulva, around your pubic bone, you can press a little inside to release tension. Stretch your labia, tingle them, press them with two fingers, and of course warm up your clit too. The clit is literally the tip of the iceberg, if you warm up the tip, the roots, which form the G-spot (just a few centimeters on top inside of your vagina) warm up too. It swells into a spongy area.
So once you are ready, use your breath and focus on your G-spot. Insert the Lelo with the curvy part and then press the outside end down, so the tip goes up and (normally) hits your G-spot. At least this is how it works for me. You can also keep the Lelo straight and press up a little. You can experiment with the speed and strength of the movement.
Kamasutra Of Self-love
If you have the feeling that masturbation feels boring, experiment with different body postures. Positions spice up sex with your partner, as do they while masturbating.
So get on to your knees, stand, lie on your back and move your legs towards your chest, lie on your side… there are many many ways to make love to ourselves; the more we are aware of our body (which includes posture), the more we feel beautiful sensations.
In this case it’s not about pushing ourselves to the final orgasmic peak, but more about the healing process of loving ourselves.
The Author Mariah Freya is a down-to-earth Yogini and sex-positive Goddess in daily life. She loves to dig into juicy topics and works with passion on her own sexuality. Get her free eBook “10 Steps to Give a Tantric Yoni Massage”! It’s a practical short guide to how to give an effective and healing Vaginal Massage. (orgasmicdiscourses.com)
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