Surrendering the romantic dream

I am walking along the beach, and a tall dark-haired man is walking towards me. He approaches me and stares straight into my eyes with a combination of tenderness and intensity.

As hours (or is it minutes) pass by, I become more and more captivated by his presence and it doesn’t take long before I realize that he ticks all the boxes I didn’t even think I had… I start melting into this meeting, my Feminine is thriving in surrender, my Masculine is… gone.

The next thing I know: we are crossing a bridge together, high on this fresh beautiful feeling…
Oblivious to reality around us, I fall through a hole in that bridge, and injure myself, brutally.

This could have developed into another love story, with a way too familiar script that is similar to a few other previous stories.
Instead, it became a meeting of two humans.
A meeting that within a week created some powerful deepening into clarity and truth.

Clearly, I am crossing a bridge at the moment. I am challenging myself to step up and know love deeper than I’ve ever known.

I did collapse in the middle of that bridge.
And it was an initiation.
A really intense and bloody one (not even figuratively). Big past life energy and karmic purging were at play.
It was a big slap and a reminder to stay on track.
Even a short moment of getting lost in a dream is not small for me.
It was a reminder to listen, to stay true to the path, true to the I. To not hand over any part of myself to a man.
Even one like .you.

Both the Shiva and the human man were there to lift me up, walk me home, wipe blood off of my body and care for me in a way that was more than unusual for a first date.
We did accelerate some karma there.
My teenage romantic is grieving, and yet…

I am surrendering the romantic dream, the fairy tales and the twin flame bullshit.
I am surrendering all I’ve ever known or imagined about love.
I want to know the highest expression of the masculine and feminine coming together.
I want to know love beyond what I have ever known, beyond what I have ever thought was possible.

Art by @alphachanneling