August 26, 2014

Body Image: Do you love what you see?

I invite you to do a seemingly simple exercise: Stand naked in front of the mirror and answer this question: “Do you love what you see?

You might be interested to know that over 90% of people do not like their bodies. That’s full on, right?

If we are too focused on our body image and insecurities, we can’t be really there with our lover, we are in the mind. And there’s no way to completely open up when we are caught in our mind. And if we can’t open up and surrender we can’t fully experience intimacy nor can we truly orgasm.

I bet you’d love to feel at home and confident in your body. Let’s look deeper into it.

Have you noticed that some women who have great physical attributes do not strike us as particularly attractive, and others who are not that physically beautiful come across as absolutely gorgeous? I’ve observed dozens of examples of that. The key here is self love. Loving ourselves expands our beauty. Seriously, it is like magic.

Loving ourselves means accepting ourselves in the totality of our being and loving all of the features we have – the perfect, the average and the ugly.

We all are human, so we each have parts of ourselves that we don’t approve of. And we must embrace these parts especially to be truly gorgeous.

We have to embrace our strength and weakness to be truly beautiful and attractive.

So let’s go back to the mirror exercise: take the part of your body that you don’t find particularly attractive and look at it in front of the mirror several times every day. And your task is to find something that you like about this body part of yours. Don’t focus on what you think it’s lacking. It can be any little thing: the color, the birthmark, the mere fact that you have this body part after all!

A great way to start feeling beautiful is to observe women who you find attractive, and ask yourself the question, what is so different about them compared to others? It may be the way they laugh or toss their hair, the way they sit or move their hands as they speak. And then you can incorporate this into your own life, it’s not that difficult after all. Simple things like this can help you start perceiving yourself as beautiful.

A friend of mine once shared her story. At school she wasn’t one of the cool and confident girls, which caused a lot of suffering to her young soul. So one day she decided to change it. A smart 15 year old, she started carefully observing the fancy girls in class. She spent a couple of months doing that, and noticed that the popular girls behaved, talked and dressed very differently to all the other girls. So she started copying them and yes, it didn’t take too long until she became one of the cool ones! Looking at her now – a tall, blond, gorgeous, elegant and confident woman – it’s hard to believe that that’s not the way she was and felt when she was growing up. Beauty and femininity were not the qualities that she inherited from her mother – not at all. She had to learn everything herself. She was lucky to have done it that early. But any woman of any age can do the same using the tools that work for her.

Any woman of any age can develop confidence and her own kind of beauty, as long as she is interested in it and willing to look for it.

If we don’t enjoy our own spirit, sensuality and personality we can never be as beautiful as we potentially could. It’s really hard to be beautiful when we’re trying to fit into societal norms. We should make our own rules and cultivate our own beauty.

Often times it all comes down to the question, how interested are we in being beautiful? Complete ownership of ourselves is what creates true beauty.

We can surround ourselves with beauty, make everything around us aligned with this value of beauty. And most importantly – enjoy ourselves. When people are enjoying themselves they are beautiful. Pleasure in life, satisfaction and frequent orgasms add to our glow.

Often other people’s critical comments about our looks leave deep scars. Especially if it happens in our childhood. Everything a child experiences sinks right into the subconsciousness. Some seemingly small incidents may result in huge body issues. That means that you don’t have a poor body image because of the way you look, but as a result of the way people made you feel about your body or your self. It is important to acknowledge that, and choose not to be affected by it anymore. Don’t let anything determine your destiny and the way you feel about yourself.

~ Willingness to accept more of ourselves leads us to feeling a sense of sisterhood with all women, of all races, social status, education. In finding ourselves we find the tissue that connects all women. ~

Very soon I am going to record a few videos in which I will share with you some simple exercises that will help you get in touch with your beauty and start owning it more.
Sneak peek at the first tip:

Discover your wounds and open to them:

Ask yourself: When was the first time you felt bad about yourself/your body? Why did you feel bad? Who made you feel bad?

This is not about blaming anyone, but to see clearly when and why you were wounded. Only then it is possible to heal. It might bring up some painful early memories, perhaps from your childhood.

Write it down. Write down the way you felt at the time and the way it makes you feel now, the way you feel it’s limiting you now. Often a process like this can help a lot. And then you need to decide that you want to change this. And change.

Do you love your body? What helped you start loving it more? What made you love it less?

As always, I’d love to hear from you. Tell me everything!

Liberate yourself

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